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Author Topic: =/\= Lotus Fleet Introduction =/\=  (Read 20539 times)

Offline Nimue

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Re: =/\= Lotus Fleet Introduction =/\=
« Reply #170 on: 08 October 2009 06:12 AM »
This is one so true about love:

I love you, not for what you are, but for what I am when I am with you.

Roy Croft
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Ellif

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Re: =/\= Lotus Fleet Introduction =/\=
« Reply #171 on: 08 October 2009 09:58 AM »
Constantly choosing the lesser of two evils is still choosing evil. - Jerry Garcia
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Offline Storm Windfall

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Re: =/\= Lotus Fleet Introduction =/\=
« Reply #172 on: 08 October 2009 10:42 AM »

"The future may be made up of many factors but where it truly
lies is in the hearts and minds of men. Your dedication should
not be confined for your own gain, but unleashes your passion
for our beloved country as well as for the integrity and
humanity of mankind."
 
-- Li Ka Shing
 
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Offline Nimue

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Re: =/\= Lotus Fleet Introduction =/\=
« Reply #173 on: 08 October 2009 09:58 PM »
A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems.
- Paul Erdos
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Offline Storm Windfall

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Re: =/\= Lotus Fleet Introduction =/\=
« Reply #174 on: 09 October 2009 12:25 PM »
In the blame game there is no winners.
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Ellif

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Re: =/\= Lotus Fleet Introduction =/\=
« Reply #175 on: 09 October 2009 12:27 PM »
Quote from: Storm Windfall on 09 October 2009 12:25 PM
In the blame game there is no winners.

maybe not, but some of the excuses are funny :D
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Offline Nimue

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Re: =/\= Lotus Fleet Introduction =/\=
« Reply #176 on: 10 October 2009 03:27 AM »
Yes, excuses can get you in even more trouble... when at excuses - friend showed me some of the incredibly stupid used in station and on-train announcements to explain why trains are delayed or cancelled in UK!

*****

Cancelled due to shortage of resources.

*****

Exploding pigeon (apparently the wires at Kings Cross Thameslink are quite low and a bird flying between the wire and the roof causes 25kV to earth itself on the train via the bird!)

*****

"Sorry about the delay so far, and that we continue to run at a reduced speed. If you would like to look outside through the right hand windows, you will see quite a lot of water".

*****

We wish to apologise most sincerely to the passengers who have recently arrived on the Royal Highlander from Inverness. Your train was delayed for several hours due to a locomotive failure near Drumochter. Then the overhead wires came down near Wigan, so your train was diverted via Manchester. A passenger was taken ill, causing the train to have to wait for an ambulance to arrive at Stockport. Finally, you were diverted via Northampton, due to signalling equipment failure south of Rugby!

*****

'Connex customer services apologises for the Cancellation of the 13:09 service from Tattenham Corner to Charing Cross but the driver has mislaid the paper with his duty on it whilst assisting to recover a failed train in the London Bridge area (whereas in fact they were short of staff!!!)'

If you like them - ASK - I have lot more, hehe!
« Last Edit: 10 October 2009 03:30 AM by Captain Aline »
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Ellif

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Re: =/\= Lotus Fleet Introduction =/\=
« Reply #177 on: 10 October 2009 09:35 AM »
http://www.businessballs.com/insuranceclaims.htm

so many here, including some from Jasper carrot's sketches

some of my favourites:
"I told the police that I was not injured, but on removing my hat found that I had a fractured skull."

"The accident was caused by me waving to the man I hit last week."

"I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law and headed over the embankment."

"I saw a slow moving, sad faced old gentleman as he bounced off the roof of my car."
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Offline Nimue

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Re: =/\= Lotus Fleet Introduction =/\=
« Reply #178 on: 10 October 2009 10:42 AM »
And didn't see him BEFORE?
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Offline Storm Windfall

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Re: =/\= Lotus Fleet Introduction =/\=
« Reply #179 on: 10 October 2009 12:47 PM »

"A dead end street is a good place to turn around."
 
-- Naomi Judd
 
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